Video Blog #3 - The past 10 years

10 years post

Its hard to believe that it has been 10 years since we first met. Sometimes people say "its feels like just yesterday" For me it feels like a lifetime. It seams like so long ago that I walked out of the airport into the arms of my father and sister. I don't think thats a bad thing either. I have so many good memories since then that I can hardly believe it was only ten years ago.

People sometimes ask "where do you see your self in ten years? Well I can tell you that 10 years ago I would have never guessed this. I would have never guess I would be sitting in panama in front of the Christmas tree. I never would have guess I would be working with my dad and cousin. I never would have guessed I would have such wonderful brothers and sisters to spend the holidays with. I never would have guessed that my mother would be writing about my story or that people would want to hear me talk about it.

I'm trying to come up with something else meaningful to say about everything that happened and I can't. I really wanted to writing something about how incredible these past years have been and how they have effected my life. I also wanted to talk about what a great family I have both here and in America. Maybe its just too hard to sum up 10 years of memories in a couple paragraphs. I'm at a loss for words. Perhaps I shouldn't even try and just enjoy being here with my family.

All I can say for sure is that I am so lucky to have found these incredible people and to be a part of their lives. I know they feel the same way. I love all of you and you all mean so much to me. Happy 10 years.

Off to Central America

I've been running around all day getting ready for my trip to Costa Rica and Panama. I leave tomorrow morning bright and early. This is going to be a business trip of sorts.

I'm working on a project with my family in Panama. My father Luis has an embroidery business that he has been running in Panama for almost 20 years now. (After he left the revolution in the mid 80s he moved to Panama to rebuild his life. I may add a post about this part of the story.)

I'm working to help them create an order tracking system. I would like this to be a pilot for a bigger project of creating open-sourced business resource for Central America. I'll probably put a post up about that when I have a better idea what it is going to be all about.

In the mean time I am planning to do some more video interviews with various family members. Keep an eye out for those sometime next week!

Leaving Tomorrow - by Nelson/Roberto

June 06

Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.
Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone,
Please come back home...

Its about 10 or 11 at night and I'm laying in bed listening to Fort Minor's "Where'd You Go?" Estefany is laying next to me sharing the earphones. She is crying softly. I hate to see my sister cry. She is almost 15 and she still cries every time I leave. I wish I could stay. I wish I could spend more time with her and with everyone else. This time it even harder to say goodbye because I know I won't be back for maybe a year.

Sometimes I feel like I am always saying goodbye, that I am always missing someone. I wondering why does it have to be like this? Why must I always be leaving tomorrow? I don't want to. Maybe its because we missed so much already and I don't want to miss anymore. Maybe its because life seams so much simpler here. Part of me just wants to stay but the other parts knows this is not my place. How are you supposed to choose between the ones you love? I know its hard on them as well.

Its the next morning and we are standing at the bus station. I've loaded my bag onto the bus. I'm almost already to head back to Costa Rica and soon after back to he US. My father sister and stepmother are here to see me off. I said goodbye to my brother this morning before he started working. My father holds me tight not wanting to let go, not wanting the moment to end. I know the feeling well.

As the bus pulls away I look back, watching them for as long as I can. As much as I hate sitting, here I know I'll be back. Nothing is going to keep me away.