What Obama's victory meant to me.

Last night the world watched as Barack Obama was elected the 44Th president of the United States and its first black president. For me it was a very emotional and special moment. I watched as a man who has inspired me, who I identify with and who I voted for was lifted into one of the most important positions in the country. What blew me away about this moment was the beauty of seeing all these people come together, united as one, to celebrate a man who gave them hope.

Being Hispanic and growing up in a white house hold the issue of race was not important but it was always there. Through out my life I have been labeled as "Mexican" because of my skin or "White" because of where I grew up. The truth is I am neither and I am both at the same time. I am Latino, white, black, Asian, German, Jewish as well as a host of other races and cultures which is a reelection of the people I call friends and family. In Obama I see myself. Some one caught between racial identifies but at the same time represents the very best parts of what it means to be American.

What struck me the most about last night was all the faces of the people in crowd. White, Black, Latino, young and old all came together to celebrate this historic moment. You could see the hope in there eyes and the admiration they had for our new president. People like Jesse Jackson and Oprah Winfrey who are leaders in there own right and last night were humbled to tears. Last night they were not famous celebrities, they were just one of the crowd.

This is where history is made. These are the moments we learned about in school. The moments that Obama himself talked about in his speech. Moments like women got the right to vote or when Martin Luther King gave his "I have a dream" speech. This must have been what it was like to be inspired by JFK. To be apart of it, to experience it for ones self is truly remarkable.

I feel I have to say congratulations to John McCain for putting up a real fight. While I don't agree with his politics, his devotion to America is unquestionable. His concession speech was classy, well spoken and sincere. Where was that John McCain during the campaign? Where was the John McCain from SNL? Last night he too rose above his parties politics and acknowledged the significance the moment with honor and respect.

To me this victory meant the realization of MLK's dream and the dream of millions of American who gave everything to make this world a better place. It represents the American dream and the ideal that anything is possible if we work hard. Last night wasn't about black or white. Republican or Democrat. It was about people coming together. People celebrating the possibility of change and the power of hope. It is a moment that represents the very best of America and a moment that I will not soon forget. Today I am proud to say I am an American.

Congratulations Barack Obama, our 44Th president of the United States of America.

A goodbye for Mama Chila - by Eva

It's been almost a week since everything happened, and today I'm here home alone, trying to understand... I've always tried to see the good things in any situation, the learnings and the lessons, the happiness after the crying, but now I wonder how long it's going to take for me to see the comfort from this loss.


But let's try to do it, because that is what she would've wanted from me...
The feeling I was so afraid of is right here with me now: back to reality, and everything seems bizarre to me... having to think again about my own life, leaving behind what I've lost—it's really hard.


She used to say we didn't have to cry for her when she died, but that day at the hospital, standing right next to her bed, watching how life was leaving her slowly and how hard it was for her to take a breath, made me cry as I have never cried before. I'm still wondering why it had to be me who was the one she choose to be with her at the very last moment. My family explains to me that it was meant to be, that I was the one who God wanted to be there, and I may know it in my mind but my heart doesn't find much comfort in any possible explanation... I only know I told her how much we loved her, how much she meant to us, and that we were so thankful for all she gave us. Then I made a prayer and watched her last breath, and I watched how our angel left.


And that's what my mom was: an angel, a beautiful person who knew how to pull everyone together, always the center of the family, the point of reunion, wisdom personified. So humble but with such dignity, so small but so strong, so old but with such energy. She suffered so much, but she gave so much love. She never hesitated to give anything to others—her time, her love, her care, her food, her advice. She was always there and everyone respected her.


Her life was difficult for her, but inspiring to others. She always found the strength to continue, to make an effort in everything she did. She always found a way to behave with integrity and morality in all situations; she never judged anyone; she never left anyone behind. She cared about others as she would her own family. Everyone loved her. Everyone called her their Mama Chila...


Despite the sadness and how difficult it was to say goodbye, a remarkable series of events took place when my mom died.


It was amazing to see how many people she got to reunite. Some people I haven't seen in so many years came to say goodbye: family, friends, and even people who never met her! One told another, and in the end she got what she deserved, a very warm, lovely and sincere goodbye from all those who loved her and had received, in one way or another, some of her love for everyone.


Many more helped for her funeral and all that that takes. Some others gave their support as friendship, holding or simply calling, and others were there in person or with their prayers... All my mom's daugthers were there, reunited after so many years. We were all together as one big family.


There are no words to describe what she means for us. Everyone who knew her understands how special and particular this lady was. It is hard to say goodbye to a person like that, however I have to do it.


Mom: You were the only mother I knew when I was a kid. You were always there for me and loved me unconditionally. You taught me good from bad and how to be a person who cares. You were my strength in every difficult time, and you were there with me to celebrate the blessing to be a mother. You will always live in my heart, but now I know you are with God in a better place.


Thanks for everything you gave me and did for me. Thanks for all the love and thanks for being my angel, everyone's angel...Goodbye mom.

Mama Chila - By Eva

What do you do when a person you love is feeling pain? What can you do to help?

It breaks my heart to leave Mama Chila at the Hospital de Heredia today, alone, knowing she is feeling pain and wondering if she will get better for good.

What a brave woman...

Today when I saw her laying on the hospital bed a bunch of thoughts and feelings came along like a big wave, like a sudden and pouring rain... how much I wanted to tell her at that moment, and now I wonder if I will have time to say it to her?

After all, the only thing I could clearly find in my mind was thanks, thanks because she made me the woman I am now, and please tell me how you can thank someone who gave you her entire life and more just in a simple act out of love?

For so many years I've been thinking I was prepared for this, but facing this kind of situations is not something you are exactly prepared for... all the feelings of lost and loneliness came again to my heart by thinking I am losing my mother, again...

Today I remeber my mother R.I.P.

I guess you could say that this is the day that changed my life forever. It was on this day 26 years ago, three days before my first birthday, that Honduran officials stormed the safe house where I was staying with my mother. At the time my family were fighting as revolutionaries in the Salvadorian Civil War.

We don't know the exact details and probably never will. We think my mother was not in the house when it happened and was able to call my grandmother one last time. We will never know exactly what happened but what I do know is that this was the last time I was with my mother.

While searching the safe house Honduran officials found me in a back room. I was placed in an orphanage for a year before getting adopted.

Its a little strange to think that one moment in time completely changed my life forever. Had my mother left the movement like she wanted too maybe I would have never been lost for 16 years. Its hard to say what might have happened. But I don't spend too much time thinking about that any more.

However for many year I did think about what happened and this day always was very hard for me. I felt like this was the day that everything went wrong, the day I lost the most important person to me. My mother.

A few years ago that started to change for me, when I realized how fortunate I have been in my life. I started to let her go.

I still think of her on this day but its not the same. I think about what she had to give up. The strength it must have taken to put her self and her family in harms way. How impossibly hard it must have been. If I would have done the same. Most of all I think about how the sacrifices she made for me gave me a life and opportunities I might have never have had otherwise.

This may seem a bit off topic but I'm a big Harry Potter fan. I suppose that part of me identifies with that character. His mother died for him so that he could do great things. I see that in my own life and its the reason that I try to live everyday to the fullest. I wanted to share a quote that J.K Rowling uses in the final harry book. To me it says, even though the ones we love are gone they still live on inside of us.

Death is but crossing the world, as friends do the seas; they live in one another still. For they must needs be present, that love and live in that which is omnipresent. In this divine glass they see face to face; and their converse is free, as well as pure. This is the comfort of friends, that though they may be said to die, yet their friendship and society are, in the best sense, ever present, because immortal. - William Penn, More Fruits of Solitude

R.I.P. Ana Milgro Escobar de Coto. You will always be with me.

Suprise party for me!

After two weeks of working with father business here in David, Panama its time to head out again. Tomorrow I will be taking the bus back to Costa Rica where I will spend a couple days with my older sister before fly home to the US.

Since yesterday was my last day of work everyone at Servicios de Bordado Coto decided to throw me a birthday/going away party. It was a lot of fun and a complete surprise! We stuffed our selves with papusas and cake.

It has been a great trip to panama. We got a lot work done and are continuing to improve the families business. I'll be writing on more about the work I am doing there on my blog for my business Coto Solutions.

One of the things that amazed me about this trip was how connected the world has become. I think my father was surprised as well when I got the commercial he made for the business on the web in about 10 minuets. It hadn't even appeared on and already most of my family had seen it.

Tomorrow I have an 8 hour bus ride from David to San Jose. Its a long day but seeing my family makes it all worth it!

Commerical for my family's business

Just thought I would share this. Its a commercial my father did for the family silk screen business here in David, Panama. Enjoy!

My Grandmother - by Nelson/Roberto

About a month or so ago I found out that my grandmother was sick. At the time we did not know what was wrong with her, but she seemed to think this was the end for her. They told me she was tired and was ready to move on.

This was something I was not expecting to hear from her. Over the past couple of trips I had started to notice her aging more than she had before. I had a lingering feeling that one day I would have to say goodbye. However it wasn't until I heard what she said to my sister that it actually hit me.

I am going to miss her. Now I can't say that I am very close to her. Since my Spanish isn't the greatest, we don't talk much.

When I see her it’s for a few hours each trip. She greets me with a smile and asks me about the rest of the family. She never asks me about my life or what I am doing. She loves to cook for me, and I definitely enjoy her food. It’s so simple and in some ways so meaningful.

It’s not talking, it’s not judging, it’s not questioning. It’s just being together.

I'm not exactly sure why this is affecting me this much. I've had other grandmothers whom I loved pass away, and I didn't feel like this. I don't think I was that close to them either. Maybe it’s because without her I would not be sitting here in my sister's house.

I don't think I can put into words what she means to me and how I feel about her. All I can say is that she never gave up on me and because of her hard work I have had so many happy memories.

She is doing much better now, but I know that one day I will have to say goodbye. Hearing those words was a wake up call in some way. I suddenly knew that each time I see her it might be the last. It’s a little sad to think about, but from now on I will appreciate so much more every moment I get to spend with her.